M.E and my #ATOS test…

Today I had my dreaded medical examination with ATOS in Luton.  I arrived on time, thanks to The Mothership chauffering me. She couldn’t get parked anywhere near the centre (which has NO designated parking – what a massive fail that is) so she drove to a side street and I went in alone. 

I was in a great deal of pain today, mostly due to my neck flaring up and so the receptionist let me sit down and she came out of her office to “book me in”.  After a 15 minute wait, I was asked to walk down a long corridor to meet Dr D.K.Mallick.   Dr Mallick was lovely, which really surprised me as the last “Dr” I saw there was extremely cold and defensive with me. 

He began by asking me about my recent foot operation, moving on to cover my last employment, medication, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Home life, neck problems and Mental Health.   This took over 3/4s of an hour. It should have taken half of that time.. The reason?  The computer system for Luton and several other towns (names escape me but they were local), has had “issues” since December.  Where they used to handle 10 claimants per day, now they are lucky to see 6.  At one point he was so frustrated and embarrassed he threatened to walk out in protest.  I am pretty sure it is a “sharing” issue as the form he fills in is online.  Possibly the broadband speed needs increasing. Anyway, I’m not a computer expert but it’s pretty much fucked up borked.

Dr Mallick skipped through a few points (including the physical exam) as he was so stressed and could see I was in a lot of pain. He did have a look at both of my feet though and told me that I would probably be called back in 6 – 12 months.  Luckily for me, I won’t have to go back as I have been offered a job working from home.  My Fabulous New Bossman (FNB) knows all about my health issues and is happy for me to do what I can, when I can.  I have, for once fallen *on*  my feet instead of falling because of them! 

Something struck me though during the process, he kept referring to CFS in a “mental” disorder, rather than a neurological condition. I called him out on this at the end of the session and he explained that the computer test is set that way.. However, this link from @latentexistence   clearly shows that CFS is regarded as a physical condition for DLA claimants. I hope that when the current ATOS test is reformed, this is corrected.

Although my examination went well today and the good Dr told me that I should have passed with no problems, the ATOS test is badly managed.  Claimants who should be exempt are still being called in, the current test is a “tick box” one which is simply not working. 

Please sign the petition below if you care about this important issue.

http://www.gopetition.com/petitions/sack-atos-healthcare/sign.html

Want to make an FOI request about ATOS? Click this link: http://foiwiki.com/foiwiki/index.php/Main_Page

****UPDATE***

Whilst I gained enough points to qualify for ESA, I was added to the “Help back to work” group and an interview was arranged for me at the Job Centre.  I never made it to the interview however as I was lucky enough to be offered a job by my neighbour.  I have been working for him ever since and am SO grateful to him I can’t tell you, nobody else would have given me such a chance with my recent sickness record (and another operation pending).   I now have my dignity, a decent standard of living (despite what some say, life on benefits is REALLY hard) and I met a lovely man who fell in love despite my very attractive boot ; )   I know I am one of the lucky ones but I promise to keep fighting for the rest of you who are being so very badly treated by this government. Much love, HC x

The Mask Is Slipping And What Lurks Behind It is Ugly.. #Conservatives #BigSociety

Are Tory Councillors loose cannon’s? Increasingly we are hearing about Tory councillor’s putting their hand-made size 9′s in it..

A Westminster Tory Councillor has launched a legal case to have a soup kitchen for the homeless banned… his reason?  Free food encourages homelessness…  Daniel Astaire says “soup runs on the streets in Westminster actually encourage people to sleep rough in central London”  .  Quite right!  I for one am packing my handkerchief up and heading for London where the streets are paved with Campbell’s …

Also flying the bigot flag for the Tory’s is the charming John Fareham who is in deep water for stating “the usual collection of retards in the public gallery spoiling it for real people” after a public meeting in which a £65million cuts package was approved. Mr Fareham has since apologised but this is not the first time he has been reprimanded for his thoughtless comments. Last year saw the Lib Dem-run council’s standards committee ordering a written apology from him before sending him on a training course. He was accused of bullying a female aide, stating that she had “lesbian hair”. Danish-born Inga Jorgensen also claims the politician regularly referred to her as “foreigner”, “woman” and “wonk”.

Since taking power, we are seeing the true face of the Tory’s and I for one am finding it extremely ugly indeed!

Nick Clegg – Hero or Zero? #HousingBenefit #Clegg #DLA #ESA

Conservative Manifesto 2010  : We will ensure that receipt of benefits for those able to work is conditional on their willingness to work.

Which roughly translated into a 10% drop in Local Housing Allowance (Housing Benefit) after one year of unemployment..  This so designed to force encourage the lazy feckers  /  work-shy unemployed to find work in their area or move to seek employment.

Today this policy has been dropped from the proposed bill on Welfare. Nick Clegg is said to have grown a pair stepped in to demand it’s removal as it effectively discourages private landlords from renting to LHA claimants.  Too late.  Private landlord’s already discriminate against LHA claimants and increasingly so since the LHA has been paid to the claimant not directly to the Landlord or Letting Agent.  I have personal experience of this, having “lost” several houses now due to being in receipt of LHA whilst awaiting for and recuperating from my recent operation.

Before we all shout hurrah for Nick and hoist him up on our shoulders there is another angle to this story. This policy was voted for. This policy was wanted by the general public!

Has that hit home?  I remember countless “man on the street” interviews prior to, during and for a long time after the election, calling for this policy.  ”Its not right we are paying their rent when they re too lazy” etc etc..  Tabloids headlines screamed about millionaire’s mansions being rented to “no-good scroungers”.  The public WANT the “work-shy” to go out and get a job. Fact.

What the public are getting is a U-Turn on a policy which could possibly work, with and ONLY with substantial investment in employment opportunities.

So what IS being introduced in this bill?  Why, set the REAL no-good, scrounging, lazy fecks to work of course.. the disabled.  Re-assessing “Incapacity Benefit” claimants WAS in the Tory 2010 manifesto sadly: We will re-assess all current claimants of Incapacity Benefit for their readiness to work … Even the way it is phrased implies that they are capable, just are they “ready” and willing?

We all know people who are or have claimed benefits they are not entitled to.  We all know we support some “lazy feckers” but in forcing all health related benefit applicants to be re-assessed and by removing DLA for residential care-home residents we are showing how badly thought out this bill really is.

But the good news is, “Euthenasia Packs” may soon be available from ATOS…

Exclusive – First Twinterview with Larry the Downing Street Cat..

Today I had the honour of being the first blogger to interview Larry, the new Downing Street Chief Rat-Catcher.  I approached him nervously as he has already attacked a journalist this week but offering him a saucer of cream seemed to appease him.  To gain his confidence I told him about my puss-cat Pickles, named after the big man of the moment, Eric of course.

Rat-Watching, Downing ST Style..

I asked Larry about his past, all I really knew about him was that he is four years old and was brought in to sort out the pest problem in Downing Street which has been growing gradually worse since May 2010.  Huge rats have been seen entering No.10, they are growing in confidence as well as size and have even been known to wave at photographers!

Larry is no stranger to rodents, having served his apprenticeship with the Marquis of  Carabas, then forming a partnership with an odd young man with big ideas. Together they headed to London where he was initially treated as a hero but soon forgotten as his then Master became more and more wrapped up in a crazy bicycle rental scheme.  

Poor Larry was at his wit’s end, penniless and forgotten when he was invited to stay in a Big house, along with other losers guests. Larry loved it in the Big house, he had as much cream as he could eat and played happily with the others until he was suddenly thrown out back on the streets again.

Since then Larry has tried to find work, appearing on the odd TV programme but finding himself ridiculed and even despised.  

Until now..  this could indeed be the lucky break he has longed for.  His mission is to clear out all the rodents and undesirables, not just from Downing Street but the whole of the UK.   Our Big Society cat.

Watch out, Larry's about !

L.O.V.E

This weekend I started thinking about Valentine’s day and the love songs that have touched my life and these lyrics popped into my head.  They remind me of my father as he loved this song by John Denver “ And some say love is holding on – And some say letting go – And some say love is everything – And some say they don’t know… ” taken from “Perhaps Love” which is below.  So I thought I’d blog my top 10 and write a little about the songs, I hope you like it,  sorry there are so many of them, if you stop reading now I’ll never know!   ; )

1. Kisses for me – Brotherhood of man This one is the first song I can remember!  It was sung for me in the 90′s by the band when they played a gig in Aylesbury : )

2.  Save a Prayer – Duran Duran I used to rollerskate to this on a Sunday afternoon in Luton.  That’s where I met the first boy I kissed, his name was Paul. I have been surrounded by Paul’s ever since!]

3.  Culture Club – Victims – Not many people seem to remember this.. It was one of the first single’s I bought and came with a large blue poster of Boy George looking beautiful.

4. A Song For Whoever – The Beautiful South – I loved this song, it was so refreshing!

5. Through the Barricades – Spandau Ballet – I fell head over heels in love to this song, sung by my ex-husband the first time I saw his band playing in our local.  As it turned out, we did have a few barricades to deal with before we could get married!

6. Tim McGraw –  Dont Take The Girl – This is a heart-breaking song, which goes beautifully with the song below ; )

7. Otis Lee Crenshaw – Just Dont Hurt Me -  You have to watch it after the one above to truly understand it ; )

8. Flight of the Conchords – If You’re Into It -  While we are in a silly mood.. I only discovered this fantastic song recently when it was tweeted to me

9. John Denver & Placido Domingo  – Perhaps Love -  Simply lovely, for my Dad x

Number 10 has been removed from youtube, much to my disappointment.. Again, a new song for me, tweeted a few months ago which, along with the tweeter has been in my head ever since.. It is a simply stunning track and it’s rather smutty too ; )    Leonard Cohen’s ” Light as the Breeze”  performed by Billy Joel. “ See if you can guess what it’s about ; )

Big thanks to @ivanjelical for getting me the track!

http://www.4shared.com/embed/511342140/481c5da3

Now I’ve finished my top 10, I keep thinking of other artists and tracks.. too many to mention without boring the pants off you so I’ll shut up and leave it here.  Happy Valentine’s Day xx

Cameron’s Pig Society !

David Cameron today tried to convice Britain yet again that we’re all in it together, in one Big Society… Judging by his new-found jowls, Ms Cushion thinks he meant one Pig Society!  All in the trough together.. ? 

Oink Oink..

There was me feeling sorry for myself…

….crying actually when a DM pops up in Tweetdeck that stops me in my tracks. FGS, how do you cope when the man you love is dying in front of you?  “Wendy” and “John” have been married for as long as I’ve been alive and have raised their children. They should be celebrating their retirement but instead Wendy has to watch John fading slowly away from her.  When he is conscious he is in agony, so they increase his morphine which takes him away from her again. 

I don’t know if John and Wendy have said their goodbye’s, I don’t know if he will even make it through to Valentine’s Day. This song goes out to Wendy and John, “If you get there before I do”.. 

* Sad update, “John” passed away on the morning of the 15th of February.  RIP .

Camera-shy, Why… ? #thereslifeintheolddogyet

I used to be ticklish until one day when I was around 10 I decided not to be any more.  I used to smoke, similarly one day I decided not to be a smoker.  The same goes for being camera-shy. Having a long-held belief that I had an enormous nose/stomach/bottom and frizzy hair, (mostly true as it goes)  I would always hide when a lens was pointed my way.  So it happened that one day last year I decided not to be camera-shy.

I vaguely remember why,  I had recently escaped from an unhappy relationship and had absolutely ZERO confidence.  Then a date was cancelled that I had been really excited about, “it’s not you, it’s me, I’m not ready, bla bla bla”.. I felt old and unwanted.  A school re-union was looming so one day I pulled myself together, got my hair coloured and de-frizzed, put on make-up and took some photos for Facebook. Actually, I took about 20 photos for Facebook, settling on two that didn’t make me want to shoot myself. Actually, for the first time in years I looked quite nice : )

THAT was the answer.. take LOTs of pictures!  I was talking to the Mothership yesterday about this, she saw my Sally Bercow pic and for once gave me a compliment.  She “never takes a good photo”, so I told her to practice.  Take an hour out, get a digital camera and have plenty of spare batteries to hand.  Take a pic, look at it.. see what is wrong and take another and another and so on until you have about 50.  I’ll bet you can find at least 5 that you like, the more you practice the more you will grow in confidence and will quickly learn how to hold your head and smile when a camera is unexpectedly poked in your face. 

Eeeeek!

Go on, go for it!  Why are we so hung up with this? We even think it’s vain to look in mirrors. I would NEVER look in the mirror in public, least some other woman thinks I am being vain, its a ridiculous hang-up to have.  Now I have finally started to grow up I am thinking “fuck-it” more often and am throwing off my hang-ups like discarded clothes. I am becoming more vocal too, as I demonstrated on Twitter yesterday by having a rather heated row!  ( The Mothership is also speaking her mind more and more, actually she is getting downright rude to some people.. hurray! Cool granny! )

One day I want to be a cool granny, I intend wearing my hair too long, my neckline too low and my heels to high. I will wear hats and carry ducklings and kittens around in a basket. I will smoke a pipe and drink whiskey! Well, maybe not.. but I sure wont be a dull old lady smelling of lavender, knitting shreddies, that’s for sure!

I wasnt sure how I would feel about being 40, it always seemed such a “grown-up” age.  I saw a tweet this week which went along the lines “I can’t imagine over 40′s having sex, eew, just eew”.. Erm, what???  I have never felt as confident in myself as I do now at 40, I just need a fella to practice on!

I have sat in an armchair for the best part of the last year, now my surgery is over (for now) I am impatient to fly, I want to grab life by the hair and drag it screaming behind me as I skinny-dip my way through the rest of my life!  So bring it on.. for my next hang-up challenge I shall dance! 

Now you, go get that camera and send me the pics : )

Shake that thang..!

Plates of Meat – Part Five #Hardware

Ouch.. no flipping wonder my foot still hurts!  Had X-Rays and have been told off a bit today, I’m not allowed to walk without the crutches for another 6 weeks : *(   and I still have to wear the stupid boot.  On the bright side though, I can bathe again tomorrow *sniffs armpits*, think I got away with it though : )

 

 

TwitWatchUK – Week 5 – Oil Baron’s, Trees and “Oh Sheeeet”‘s

Another week already, who would’ve thunk?

This week has been mostly overshadowed with the unrest in Egypt. Despite the “Day of Departure” demonstration, the ruling President Murbarak still maintains his position, some people just can’t take a hint can they.. ?

In other news, the Conservative’s have cleverly solved the war over NHS reforms by smoking us out with library closures and  forest-selling.  The forest-selling off really won’t affect us though as they already have it under control..

 

They took all the trees
And put them in a tree museum
And they charged all the people
A dollar and a half to see ‘em

Available for sale for just £21.80 (I kid you not)

 

Da da da da da da da da da da… doesn’t sound the same without the music does it?

In TV news this week the delightfully sweary grandma from Gavin and Stacey, Margaret John passed away *sad face* 84 year old Margaret said in 2010 “I get hugged by women and kissed by men in supermarkets. It’s lovely!”  “It’s great to be a sex goddess at my age!”   But *happy face* it was announced that the hit 80′s Dallas, last aired in 1991 would be returning to our screens..YAY! But how will they bring it back? Ms Cushion would love it to return via another Patrick Duffy/aka Bobby Ewing ”it was all just a dream” shower scene..

Speaker John Bercow’s wife Sally caused a right rumpus again this week, this time posing in just a bedsheet for a Valentine’s newspaper special.  While I think she was probably a bit daft to pose as she did, let he who is without sin cast the first stone and all that… doesn’t mean that we can’t take the mick mercilessly though does it ; )